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| This isn't going to be a small post, nor will it be filled with pictures, as mine normally are. No, tonights blog is one prompted by a long, emotional, draining but very good night. We had HighSchool/JrHigh Youth group tonight...once a month we do what we call "fireside chats" where we light a fire in our fireplace and pick a topic to talk about for the night. Tonights topic: Halloween. Now, most of the response to this were "what are we going to talk about for 2 hours on that subject?" But man, did we ever fill that two hours like it was two minutes. What started as the history of Halloween, what their general thoughts were on it, and what traditions normally are, flowed into an indepth conversation about scary movies, haunted houses, and all that stuff that normally ties into that realm of things.
As most of you know, I finished my "phase" of watching scary movies soon after highschool. I wish I could have identified it sooner, but didn't have the maturity or the knowledge to do so I guess. I never really enjoyed scary movies, i just thought I did so I put myself through quite a few movie nights "enjoying" being scared. I remember my turning point...we were watching "The Grudge" at a friends house, and 5 minutes into it something nasty happened, and I stood up, walked to my car, and vowed that Satan would no longer have a hold in my life in that area. That was it, I was done. Ever since then, I have been an extremely strong advocate of not watching scary movies, ESPECIALLY anything having to do with demon posession or anything in that realm. But as I quickly discovered, that is not a shared feeling among most. And as tonight reminded me, there is still something so attractive about those movies to people, and now to me, it's sickening.
This blog could go on and on, as I spill out my feelings on this subject. My fuel for this topic comes mostly from working in the villages, where real life comes into play in bright light, and demons are not something you pay $9.50 at a theater to experience. No, its free, and its life every day for the kids and teens that live there. So why....why, why, why do we watch something that is SO incredible real and prevelant today and that Satan has such a HUGE hold on?!?
There is obvious controversy in the christian body as to whats okay and not okay in this area. To me, its pretty stinkin black and white now....there are no "maybe this is okay, I only get scared a bit." But comes to realize yet again there is still so much gray in this area.
A movie just came out called "Paranormal Activity." Extremely low budget movie...but nevertheless, a movie that theaters are taking out early because so many people are coming out, returning their tickets because of being so scared. Some people laugh.....I don't. One of my girls that was there saw one girl start puking in the theater....some cried....others screamed. And its ALL playing on mind...there is no violence in it. Everything inside of me screams no to that movie....it has demonic written ALL over it. When a theater has to take a movie out early?!?!??! I have never heard of that before....there is obviously a force behind that movie that no one should mess with.
Then you have movies like "Saw"...I have talked to multiple people about this movie, including kids tonight, because I have heard over and over again that it is intriguing. Now, I haven't seen it, but I read the review on the gore that it shows. Again, why why why would you fill your mind with that crap?!? To me, its just so black and white. Jesus calls us to fill out minds with whats pure and lovely, and I can't think of to much that's farther away from that then what I read about these movies. The fact that its called "Torture Porn"makes me want to run far, far away. . .and how it captures the attention of some still baffles me.
Tonight, we talked about having "evil spirits" inside of us...spirit of control, spirit of anger, and we touched base on the spirit of fear. I shared how Satan has always used fear in my life...i have always hated the dark and I scare VERY easy. So i shared with them when I started watching these movies, I was opening a door for Satan to play off that spirit and have a stinkin hay day with it. Which led us into the discussion of how watching scary movies can very easily open a door to allow anything of that realm to start seeping in. VERY, very crazy to watch these kids react to that thought....most had never looked at it that way.
After youth group ended, one of my girls came up to Brian and asked if we could pray over her. Brian and Rochelle (youth pastor and his wife), two other students and myself went into an office and asked her what was going on. Through tears pouring out of her eyes, she shared that she had seen the "Paranormal Activity" a few days ago, and she had been having overwhelming fear since then. We got to pray over her, which was so awesome. When everybody else had left the room expect Rochelle, i slammed my fist down on the desk and expressed how badly I want others to have this passion, but it just doesn't seem to be that common. Because look what it does to people?!?! It may seem like all fun and entertainment at first....but golly, is it ever not. After I left the church, I couldn't help but ask the question again, "why do we watch something that puts in us an emotion that God commands us not to have?" In 2 Timothy, God calls us to not have the spirit of fear, plain and simple. So, aside from the fun, quick jumps and adrenaline rush, would we in reality put ourselves in a situation to experience something that God hates??
Like I said, this blog is long...my apologies. I'm impressed you have stuck with me this far. I just get so flipping worked up about this, and can't understand why some just don't see it. I think becoming a mom has made my crazy sensitive to other things in movies as well. Language, violence, sexual crap....my tolerence for things has completely gone away, and in many ways I am thankful. After reading that verse tonight, I really took rest and affirmation that is OK not to give in to watching most of what Hollywood offers just because "its entertainment and i'm de-sensitised to it anyway." I just think God has such a higher calling for our hearts and minds that what we allow ourselves to watch and listen to. And why we do allow ourselves to endulge? All for the sake of entertainment. . .like i said, maybe its just becoming a mom thing, but man have I been so strongly convicted and passionate about this lately, as I'm sure you couldn't tell :)
I could go on....this is a subject that I am, and always will be passionate on. These are all my opinions obviously, so disagree or agree as you like. This is not written to cause guilt or arguments....its just my heart and I needed to get it all out before the night was over. Now, off to wash dishes and go to bed, all the while praying for safety of mind and heart this weekend. Love to you all~
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| So, I am convinced I am living in the wrong time period. I don't know which one I belong in, but sometimes I just feel as though I don't fit in. Here are a few reasons why - 1.) It is common for some to get extremely worked up about the Native hospital here and the free health care that they can receive. It seems that whenever that topic is brought up here at work, the ladies in my office go off for a LONG time about it, while I sit in my chair, pretending to be pre-occupied and not joining in the conversation, but of course absorbing every word said. I really just HATE talking about some ethnicities getting more benifits then others in so many areas. All it seems to breed in people is hate, bitterness, prejiduce, and emotions that I don't care to tap into. I just hate letting my heart and mind go there, because for me, it does no good. So, instead of joining in on conversations, I tend to flee from them. Maybe its that I don't understand.....don't understand how much money I personally lose out of my bank account to fund that hospital. Maybe it's that I haven't lost a job because I was white. Maybe it's because i'm so opposite of being policically minded that I can't defend/nor join in to converstions. 2.) I HATE talking about "the drunks and homeless" of Anchorage...because guess where the topic goes to? Natives. . ."all of 'em" If I see a drunk or homeless guy, whether white, native, black, hispanic...my first thought isn't "wow dude, get a job and quit asking for money. (or) I wonder if he's really homeless or just bumming money." I always wonder if they are from a village and which one, do they have family, and what is truely causing their situation. Because not ALL intoxicated people on Anchorage's streets have the exact same story. . .unlike what some like to believe. Again, maybe I just don't understand. . . Whatever it is, there have been more times then one that I have stuck out like a sore thumb....keeping my mouth shut because I strongly dislike talking about something where I am very obviously minority. I am not a strong enough person to talk about it...tears come easily because my passion for people far overides any potical or pratical reasons one could bring up. So family. . .what time period do I belong in? I'm a basket case eh?? As i'm sure you can tell, a conversation just happened in the office, and i just had to blog and get my mind barf out. Now it's back to work. . . I promise a fun blog is coming with lots of juicy pictures...it's been to long :) Love you all~ | | |
| http://www.adn.com/news/politics/story/837371.html
A blog of mine from December 2006 -
A man of influence . . .tonight i went caroling. . .it was SO much fun and suuuper cold! The last place we stopped, housed a husband (80 years old) and wife and their daugter visiting for christmas. His name was Red Boucher who was a former lieuteniant (sp) in Alaska. He had a stroke recently and is unable to walk as well as his speech being a wee bit impaired.
We all filed inside by invitation, removed our shoes and shuffled our cold, wet feet into the living room where he lay in his uber comfy looking bed :) He had sweet tattoos on his arms and he just had an experienced look to him. We sang a few songs and he sang right along with us, which was so fun to see him enjoying them. He then requested "silent night" to which we sang with great enthusiam as we watched him sing along.
We were getting ready to leave, and he asked if he could pray a prayer of blessing over us before we left. Just a few moments into the prayer, tears filled my eyes as his words flooded over me. Words full of wisdom, understanding, challenge and encouragment. I walked over to his wife afterwords and gave her a hug, thanking her for the love she shows to her husband in taking care of him to which she responded with a huge amount of thanks and another hug. I walked over to Red, reached for his hand to shake it, and he drew it up to his mouth and kissed it. Tears came again, as this man full of so much joy, wisdom, and peacefulness kissed my hand saying "God bless you" just as Papa, my dear friend and Grandpa, did years ago.
It has only been a few times that I come across people like that that bring me to tears because of the way they speak and act. The way they draw your heart into theirs as they share and pray for and with you. I had the same experience with Carl and Margie in Pedro Bay. Papa and Granny, Carl and Margie, Red and so many others. . . the heritage and love that they leave behind will be evident footprints of God's love and faithfullness in their lives.
I went caroling tonight. . .to bless others through our singing and interacting. But God had a different plan, choosing these people tonight to speak to me in ways that I need more often.
Goodnight family~ | | |
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